I often hear people quoting Gary Chapman’s book on the Five Love Languages. I’ve read his book and I’ve found it useful. Chapman believes that everyone has a love language and that once we’re aware of it, it’s easier to build relationships especially when two people speak different languages.
Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Gifts and Acts of Service are Chapman’s five categories of love. While he ascertains that each of us has a dominant language, he concedes that it’s likely that we each have a secondary language also.
Physical Touch is self explanatory. There are those of us that want a hug and in my home and with my boys, that describes me perfectly. However, it’s my secondary language as I’m dominated by a desire for Words of Affirmation. I love to hear that I’ve done a good job at work or preparing a meal. Those strong positive words that reinforce my value and my being are incredibly welcome and ironically, my dear husband speaks the same language.
Quality Time describes those who truly thrive on the time spent with loved ones. My youngest son falls into this category as he still cannot wait for his evening bedtime story and loves to do activities with us.
Gifts is the language of my oldest son and the hardest for me as I have no gifting aptitude at all. The word “gift” comes from the Greek word “charis”, which means grace or an undeserved gift. This means that gifts given have nothing to do with an expectation (or a holiday) and are truly meant as a manifestation of love.
The Five Love Languages would have me believe that a love for cooking and a love for feeding others is the language known as Acts of Service. It is in many cases but in my case, parenting is just a service-oriented vocation.
As we approach Valentine’s Day, often known as the holiday of love, a great meal is part of the celebration and in my kitchen, my love language is roasted cauliflower.
The heavenly taste of roasted cauliflower acts as a physical touch on my being. The compliments about the roasted sweetness are strong, words of affirmation. Sitting around the table, eating together is quality time. My dinner, given that I am not one to purchase gifts, is my present to my family for their enduring love. And finally, yes, this thing called family is an Act of Service.
- one giant head of cauliflower separated into florets
- 3 small fennel bulbs sliced
- 1/3 cup of olive
- fresh ground pepper
- red pepper flakes
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Spread cauliflower and fennel out on a large baking sheet covered with parchment paper. Drizzle olive oil over the vegetables. Add salt and ground pepper. Bake for 15 minutes and then stir well. Bake another 15 minutes. Top with red pepper flakes and serve immediately. Savor with your loved ones.